Big-Car Drivers Should ‘Have Sex and Travel’

No. ‘Have sex and travel’ is not about doing the deed whilst on holiday; it’s this. Automologist MAC thinks that SUVs and MPVs are bad ideas; here’s why… 

You know, I used to think with age comes wisdom, but as I age there is one thing that I just do not get: Why is the world obsessed with owning a Sports Utility Vehicle or outsized Multi-Purpose Vehicle? The more I think about it, the more I am convinced that these vehicles are much the same as Nero playing the fiddle whilst Rome burnt.

Being a parent who does the school run, I have to fight my way through endless seas of these vehicles every morning, only to see the seven-seater Alphard in front of me open its cavernous doors just for one kid to hop out. Surely little Johnny would fit in a smaller car…

MPVs and SUVs are probably the least sensible solution on the planet to solve the personal transportation problem. I cannot fathom the amount of really clever engineers that have laboured countless hours to create such a laughingly bad remedy.

Sure, I know the argument about having enough room to get the entire family in when the grandparents visit, but then you are driving a compromise for the rest of the time. Surely there must be a ride-hailing app suitable for this. Haven’t you heard of UberX or GrabCar Six-Seater?

In an age of high fuel costs and increased environmental awareness, in which lighter and smaller should win the day, how did big car companies persuade the buying public to purchase cars that are bigger, heavier and less fuel-efficient. Have you ever tried to park one of these darn things in a shopping mall, or worse, come back to your sensible car to find one parked so close to you that you would need a can-opener to get into your vehicle.

Just consider: over in Americaland, Ford has already announced that it will only be making SUVs, pick-ups and the Mustang. Sure, Ford is the king of the SUV and the current ‘Stang is about as good a car as you can get. Even though Ford has the Focus and Fiesta in its range that can outsell the mighty VW Golf in many European markets, it will not offer any sedans in the US of A; surely this is absolute madness and all the world’s car companies should be locked up in an asylum.


Germany is in love with THIS American Car.

Their own cars are unreliable?! 


Globally, some 40% plus of all personal transportation vehicles sold fell into these two categories last year. Now, just pause for a moment and think about that number. Almost half the world’s car-buying public are convinced that a vehicle best suited for tackling mountain roads is best for taking little Johnny to school. It could be worse—you could own one of those new MPVs that is not much more than a converted delivery van and think that it is safe enough for your near and dear ones. It is not.

Of course, this could all be a final farewell for the internal combustion engine, as automakers strive to be the first choice in an electrified new world order, a process that includes the ditching of ICE models. But it does strike me as strange that we aspire to have the shiniest, largest most chrome-festooned chariot in front of our house whilst the planet slowly warms itself to cooking point. And, of course, converting to EV cars may not be the answer to the global warming problem.


If you are in car buying mode, I would really beg you to go and try one of the more economical, environmentally sensible cars like the Ford Focus/Fiesta. Or maybe one of the cars in the VW range. Even a small Peugeot, perhaps.

Remember this when the salesman tries to convince you that you should get that MPV because it will tell your neighbours what a great person you are or the SUV because then everyone will know that you have more money than them. This is the point at which you remember about global warming and politely tell the salesman to have sex and travel!

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